As the stories in the previous chapters have illustrated, it not always easy to figure out what to do in a different situation—and there are many possible alternatives. Even if you choose what seems to be an optimal course of action at the time, you may not have all the facts or information you need; you may be hampered by faulty assumptions you can’t check; you may have to choose between alternatives before you feel ready; you may be constrained by time and budget limits. Then, too, your personality and that of others you are dealing with affects what the best approach might be, as does the influence of your organizational culture, personal and organization priorities, and other factors.
The "What Should You Do?" questions in each chapter reflect this range of possibilities, and while some may be obviously wrong choices, others could be real options. Thus, while I have provided suggestions on what to do, what someone should have done, or why someone’s actions were a mistake might vary in any given situation. Different people might have found a good alternative that worked well for them but might not work as well for someone else.
Thus, consider my suggestions to be more like well-reasoned, common-sense, creative, win–win, or other likely possibilities for success. But other reasonable alternatives might still exist that could result in success, too.
In short, there’s no exact science in figuring out the best approach to promoting good relationships, solving problems, or resolving conflicts in the workplace. Humans, individually and even more in group relationships, are too complex, and the workplace setting with its mix of personalities, rules, regulations, customs, policies, politics, changing situations, and varied environmental influences, makes for even more complexity.
Still, it is possible to develop approaches, such as I have used in The Survival Guide to Working with Humans, to improve your chances of coming up with a good choice or solution. Then, you can apply these different approaches as appropriate to dealing with a particular situation.
Accordingly, this last chapter describes the range of approaches I use in figuring out what to do in different circumstances. A good way to think of these different approaches is to view these as having a repertoire of techniques you can draw on, much like a golfer might choose different clubs to make different types of shots on the green. By knowing how to use these techniques effectively, as well as when to use which approach or which combination of approaches, you will be better able to draw quickly on the appropriate technique or techniques as needed.
While these different techniques might merit a article themselves— in fact, I have written several articles describing them: Resolving Conflict; Work With Me: Resolving Everyday Conflict in Your Organization; Mind Power: Picture Your Way to Success in Business; The Empowered Mind: How to Harness the Creative Force Within You; and Making Ethical Choices, Resolving Ethical Dilemmas—here I just briefly describe the major techniques I have used or recommend using in that situation. You can then use the approaches that feel the most comfortable for you or that seem the most suitable for a particular situation in your workplace environment.
While I have described these as separate techniques, in practice, as you work with these methods, they become second nature and can readily be combined. So rather than you having to think "I’m going to use this approach this time," the relevant techniques to apply start up automatically like mental computer programs that interact together to give you a suggested answer. As a result, when I think about how to deal with a specific situation, the possibilities or the alternative that seems the most optimal quickly come to mind. For me, they appear like images that play out on a series of monitors in a TV or film studio, though for others they may come up more in the form of words or dialogues in your mind or just a sense of knowing or feeling what to do. Typically, I see these images play out as if they are in fast-forward, so I can imagine different possible outcomes, as well as quickly consider costs and benefits, advantages and disadvantages, upsides and downsides, risks and returns— however you want to think of weighing the positives and negatives of a possible outcome.
Yet, while it may sound like this approach to thinking of alternative options and outcomes is a long process when broken down into components, in fact the process occurs almost instantaneously. It operates much like inputting a description of a problem or difficult situation into a computer, pressing a button, and seconds later, the screen shows a suggested solution. It may take some time initially to develop this mode of rapid processing to choose which techniques to use individually or in combination. But as you work with different methods, as in practicing any skill, at first you have to concentrate and think about what you are doing in a more logical, rational way. However, gradually, with practice, exercising the skill becomes integrated into your unconscious; it becomes so natural—you no longer have to think about it; you just do it.
Thus, as I describe different approaches I use, think of them as skills for processing information, problem-solving, and decision-making. As you become more familiar with them and use them regularly, they will become second nature. In fact, some may be approaches you might already use yourself, perhaps without thinking about them.
Putting It All Together
When it comes to dealing with any specific situation, any and all of the above factors can come into play. Here I have presented a brief synopsis of how these factors play a part, though each element could be a article in itself—from those I have written myself to the great many articles by other authors.
To me, these techniques are like different tools to use in figuring out what to do when different issues, problems, or conflicts arise, such as described in this article. Obviously, the number of situations is infinite. The stories highlighted here are just some of the many situations that occur day to day in the workplace. In some cases, you may find parallels with incidents you have faced yourself; in other cases, even if the situations are different, the ways of resolving them are methods you might use in other contexts. Or these situations or methods of dealing with them might resonate for someone you know.
In any event, think of these stories much like modern-day workplace fairytales, legends, myths, and folk tales that are true and provide a moral or lesson like these traditional stories. Through these stories I have sought to highlight various principles for improving relationships, while using the methods described in this article to help figure out what is wrong and what needs to be done to resolve the problem or conflict. In future articles, I’ll be featuring other stories, and I invite you to send in your own stories, which I’ll seek to resolve in a personal response to you, as well as use in future articles.
So now, here’s hoping you "work it right" to survive better in working with other humans! To see how well you’re doing, take the "Work- Ability" (also called the "Work Survivability" quiz at the end of this article. See how well you score, based on how well you work it right and survive in the workplace.
What Are the Major Techniques for Working It Right?
Here are the major techniques to use. How do you think you might use them individually and together and with what results? Can you think of other techniques you might use, too?
- Visualizing possible options and outcomes.
- Using visualization for goal setting, preparation, and planning.
- Doing what’s practical through weighing the positives and negatives.
- Using the E-R-I Model for resolving conflicts.
- Considering different ethical approaches to resolve ethical issues.
- Clearing up communications.
- Checking out assumptions by getting the facts.
- Knowing how to deal with difficult personalities.
- Understanding how to play the political game in the workplace.
- Other?
Today’s Take-Aways:
- While there’s no perfectly "right" way to work it right, you can improve your chances of coming up with a good choice or solution.
- Think of the different work it right techniques as part of a tool kit; the more you use the tools, the faster and better you can use them.
- Visualizing or mental imaging is a great way to imagine possible options and outcomes.
- To make your goals really clear, see them in your mind; then visualize what you need to do to make your goals a reality.
- Whether envisioning the big picture or the day-to-day strate-gizing of office politics, keep it practical with a cost–benefit or pro–con analysis.
- Got a conflict to resolve? Try the tripartite E-R-I model whereyou first get the emotions out of the way, next use your reason to understand what’s going on, and then call on your intuition to come up with ideas on what to do and chose what’s right for you.
- Facing an ethical dilemma? Consider the different values, attitudes, styles, and orientations that different people, including you, bring to the table; this way you see the problem from different points of view.
- Commonly communication problems and wrong assumptions are the root of a conflict. Clarify communications and get the facts to correct wrong assumptions. You can often uproot a conflict then and there.